FULL DISCLOSURE: I wrote this post about a week ago and am just getting it posted (isn't that how life works??) We're getting a little into "Katie Philosophy" but sometimes it helps me figure out what I really am trying to say by talking (or in this case writing) it out. Also there is a little profanity in this post so just keep that in mind...
For anyone who didn't talk to me this week, the beginning was like hell. We had a project due Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. I got 4 hours of sleep Sunday night finishing my Residential project. Then starting Monday morning I was up for 40 hours straight working on my lighting project due Tuesday afternoon. To put it in perspective a little there were 20 about of 26 of us in the computer lab at 4am Tursday morning still working. The amount of work we had is a whole other topic but the point is by the end we were all feeling a little broken.
We have a secret Facebook group for just our class and at the end of Tuesday one of my friends posted this message for all of us:
They tried to break us this week, but we prevailed, this hell of a week is over, we did it. We are part of the best design school in the nation, if you have made it to this point you should know, you are one of the top 27 students in the nation. Take that b****esssssssssss.
I sometimes joke about quitting Interior Design when I get really tired of a project but I know I never, ever would actually do it. I know 1000% that I am in the right major and I am so lucky to be able to do what I love what I love every single day...and to even have found what I love because so many people don't even have that.
Also I love that it's hard. I don't think I've ever had a time in my life where I've picked the easy academic path. Lord knows I love a challenge and this definitely falls in the challenging category.
This brings me back to my friend's post. It reminded me so much of what I had been telling myself over those two days when I got tired: you are awesome and even though this sucks it's going to be over soon and it will be worth it when you get to do exactly what you want to do.
I think right about now, everyone that knows me can laugh because I'm sure you've heard me say "I'm awesome" at one point or another. The sad part, though, is as I write this and you read it, I sound egotistical but in reality, that's not me at all. The more I think about it, the more I realize there is something wrong with a society where it is socially acceptable to tell people how much you are unhappy with yourself...how fat you are, how others have things so much better...but it's not ok to say I'm great? That I am so happy with who I am? Think about that one.
Don't get me wrong. There is definitely a fine line between confidence and cockiness. And as I've thought about it, I think the difference is the humility to admit that you don't know everything. I will say that freely as well. I don't know everything...not even close. But you know what? Thats a GREAT thing. I love learning new things because that's how you become a better person. I think it's so important to be open enough to accept criticism and make it constructive and to know that there are so many things that people can teach you. Learning new things is one of the best parts of life.
I guess this brings me to my point of this post. (ohh wait this post had a point and wasn't just you rambling??) Each of has unique talents and gifts. No one has the same ones and sometimes it's easy to get caught up in what everybody else has. But just remember that other people are thinking the same thing about you. So instead of wishing away our time maybe we should instead be focusing on what we DO have and developing those talents. And you know what? It is PERFECTLY FINE to say you know what? I really like who I am! I'm pretty great! Just remember...there's always something more you can learn :)
P.S. Just for the record...readers, I love you all...and think you're pretty awesome!
P.P.S. All the pictures are of my interior design family :)