Easter Weekend, the Russell Family, and a Prayer Request

This is a post I talked about writing with Abigail after Easter, but I think after a few things recently (I'll explain in a minute) this might go in a different direction than I originally planned.

Abigail and JJ on Easter

This is a post about family.

Imitating the freshman at a Wesleyan baseball game

If you know anyone in my family (even somewhat), you probably know that we are close. I love my family and, honestly, I think I have one of the best ones out there. But this post isn't about the Scheid family. It's about my "new" family, the Russell's. 

It's kind of weird in a way to call them my family because I'm not the one marrying into the family, Abigial is, but in a way this marriage unites both of our families. It's something I've thought about since the engagement...our family unit will never be the same as it was. When JJ and Abigail get married they will each be leaving their own respective families and making their own, new family. BUT the thing is, you can't think about "losing" a member of your family. In reality, you're gaining a member...actually LOTS of members.

JJ's brother, Chad

This story starts a few weeks ago when Abigail called me to see if I wanted to join her at the Russell's house for Easter. I had been contemplating going home but I had just been home for Spring Break and really didn't want to drive 8 hours or drive 2 hours then fly, so, going to the Russell's house in Atlanta seemed like the perfect solution. 

My first thought, however, was that I didn't want to be a burden. Beth (Mrs. Russell) has been pretty sick with cancer but Abigail assured me that Beth had given her the go ahead to invite me. Also, I was thinking that while Abigail was marrying JJ and had a reason to be there, I didn't want to be a kind of tag-a-long sister. Then I thought about it from another perspective...if Chad (JJ's younger brother) had wanted to join Easter at our house, I would have LOVED for him to be there. 

Easter cookies before

The weekend wound up being such a great and enjoyable one for me (and hopefully for everyone else too). I was able to meet JJ's grandparents as well as his aunt and uncle. It was wonderful to be able to get to know more people in the Russell family before the actual wedding day and I think that knowing everyone will help make that day even more special. 

We started out with a bit of a laugh when the cookies I made were crushed by my backpack as I was driving through downtown Atlanta. We wound up separating the broken ones and snacking on them all day and saving the pretty ones for Easter dinner. No use crying over broken cookies right? I was continually assured that they tasted delicious despite being broken ;) (Plus no one wanted to eat them initially at the engagement party so maybe this is the way to go??)

The Easter Cookies After (Blamed on my archnemesis, Atlanta traffic)

The rest of the weekend was pretty relaxed, which was nice after school work picking up and becoming more stressful. We spent a good part of the weekend hanging out, playing games, and just enjoying each other's company. The first night was fun because I was able to model my bridesmaid's dress for Beth. Chad and I wound up scheming about our plans for the wedding...just don't tell Abigail ;) (Abs...I'm kidding!)

Just Practicing

I'm happy to report that like my family, the Russell's are able to laugh when things go wrong. After Aunt Kelly had spent all morning making Easter dinner, the rolls that were in the oven caught on fire! Someone opened the oven and called for a fire extinguisher. At the same time, Abigail and I yelled "SHUT IT". Not that we know from experience or anything, but for anyone that doesn't know, if something catches on fire in your oven, just shut the door and turn it off. The fire will run out of oxygen and die. Also, don't use a fire extinguisher in your house unless you absolutely have to. That stuff coats EVERYTHING in a three room radius. Like I said, not that we know from experience or anything...

Husker, Another Visiting Family Member

Abigail and I also had a good laugh because while we were at someone else's house we still did the exact same thing we do every morning at our house we have to get ready for a family event. The white jeans I packed had a stain on them when I pulled them out so I borrowed Abigail's and then she thought her shirt was too thin so she wound up wearing my back up outfit...all of which we wound up frantically ironing before leaving for church because we were running late. All we could hear was Mom saying, "You should have laid our your clothes the night before!" 

Before Easter service

While the funny parts of the weekend were definitely memorable, I think the highlight of the weekend was watching the History Channel's The Bible Easter night. I was originally going to drive back to Auburn that night but decided to skip my class Monday morning and spend more time in Atlanta. In the big scheme, I'll remember my night at the Russell's but I wouldn't have remembered that class. But back to the show, if you haven't seen it, it's a 4 part series that chronicles the stories of the bible. The episode we watched was the last one which started with the crucifixion and went through the ministries of the apostles. I can't begin to even describe how good the show is. They did an amazing job producing it. We all already know the stories but it's one thing to know it and it's another thing to see it. It really helped me think about the stories from the perspective of the time. For example, what do you think Pontius Pilate was thinking when the whole city got dark just as Jesus died? Or how about how much courage it took for the apostles to go where Jesus sent them even though they knew very well they could be killed? It made me think about something important too...Jesus could have opted out of the crucifixion quite a few times, but he didn't. He went through all that pain. Do you think you would have been able to go through all of that for something you were making up? Which leads me to think either he was the craziest guy who ever existed or he was the real thing.

This is starting to shift into the second part of this post, but I also feel EXTREMELY blessed because it was a good weekend for Beth. She was able to sit downstairs on the love seat for most of the day and we could switch up sitting beside her and chat. Abigail told me this past weekend, that Easter was the first really good weekend Beth had had since the engagement, which was the last time I had been to visit. How lucky did I get to visit on those two weekends?  When I say that I consider myself lucky, I really do. I feel like I was able to really talk to Beth and get to know her better when I visited and for that, I feel truly grateful. 

Three Generations of Mrs. Russell's

I visited Abigail this past weekend (the weekend after Easter) at Furman for one of her showers. Jackie (a fellow bridesmaid, and Abigail's friend from high school) flew in that night too and we were all sitting talking when Abigail got a call from JJ saying his mom was in the hospital and it wasn't good. Instead of me explaining the situation, I'll just repost JJ's blog post from CaringBridge:


Last night at 10PM we had to rush Beth (Mom) to the hospital due to continuous vomiting and stomach pain. After performing a few scans, the Dr. informed us that some unknown source is causing air to leak and build up in her abdominal cavity. Were Beth stronger, and able to handle surgery, finding the source of the air and fixing the problem would not be unbelievably difficult. Unfortunately, the caner and chemo therapy have made her very weak, and surgery is not an option. Thus, we find ourselves in a "wait-and-see" situation.

All we can do is wait-and-see what the Lord decides to do. There's a part of me that wants to make it sound like that's an easy thing right now, but it's not. I know that God is good and that he loves us, but I'm finding it hard to trust His goodness amidst these circumstances. It's crazy to think that he really really does have this whole thing under control...ALL of it!

Although we do not know exactly what is causing Beth's complications, we do know that the situation is very serious. Dr.'s have instructed us to inform family members and loved ones to come and say hi to Beth ASAP. We are at Northside Forsyth Hospital in room 5060.

We are so thankful for the love and community that God has blessed us with! Please continue to pray for Beth's continued peace and comfort - that she would rely on the Spirit to give her peace and provide a way for her. God's exact will for her life is completely unknown to us, but we would love prayers for miraculous healing of her body! Thankfully, He has already done the most beautiful miracle and healed her heart.

JJ

"The Lord your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing."

- Zephaniah 3:17


We assured Abigail that if she wanted to go Atlanta, then that's what she should do...no one really cared about the shower and this was way more important. What wound up happening was that we moved the shower up in the day and after Abigail drove to Atlanta after. 

I drove home Sunday afternoon and stopped in the hospital on my way back. Abigail said before that this was so new for us because we haven't really been around death (or scary serious illness) before, which is partly true. But besides from my grandfather who passed away when I was 6, we haven't experienced the death of a family member and there really is no guide book for how to deal with this roller coaster.

I was able to talk to Beth for a few minutes and spent the rest of the time with JJ, Abigail and some family and friends. I'm very glad I went, but it was difficult in two ways...first, it was really hard to see Beth looking so weak. While I haven't spend too much Beth, she is one of those people that you can't help loving after meeting. [cue me trying not to cry as I keep writing] I think Abigail said it best when she said Beth has a "gentle spirit". I don't think I've used that phrase before for anyone, but Beth truly embodies it. Another remarkable thing is that I've never heard her complain. Abigail said that the entire Russell family is like that. What an amazing gift to have! How often do we complain about the smallest things? We could all take notes from this part of the Russell book. Finally, and most importantly, Beth and the entire Russell family have an incredible strength of faith. I don't know even where to start on this, but they have the rock solid belief that this is God's will. I wish I could have recording Terry's dinner blessing Easter weekend because that family sure does know how to pray. You can see the depth of their faith in the strength they are able to show even if something this difficult...that even through all this, they can have peace. I think that's what being a Christian is all about...being able to keep your beliefs when things get hard and then in turn, to use as your strength when you have none. 

Three Generations of Beautiful Wedding Rings

The second difficult part of visiting the hospital is seeing people you love hurting. The image I keep going back to is Terry holding Beth's hand by her bed, head bent, just praying. It hurts my heart so much to even think about the pain of having a ill spouse. And while, I love everyone in the Russell family, I can't tell you how hard it is to see your sister hurting. While the Russell's, Abigail, and I all have our faith, it still doesn't make any of this easy. It's still really hard. And you know what? Life is pretty darn hard sometimes.

But you know what else? Life is still GREAT. Leaving the hospital really helped put my life in perspective for me. While I still have problems, in the big picture, they are so minuscule in comparison to other people's problems. It reminded me of the quote, "If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back". So while life is hard sometimes, and it's so easy to complain, they are 100x more things we should be thanking God for. And those are the things we should be really putting our energy into.

Abigail and Husker

As I was saying goodbye, Terry said, "Thank you for coming and for joining our family". My response was, "Thank you for letting me join your family". I know this post doesn't do this incredible family justice but I am beyond thankful to know them and glad to know that this is who Abigail is going to be spending the rest of her life with. And while, I'm not the one marrying into this family I would be proud to call them my family too :)

As I was about halfway through this post, my mom texted me to tell me that Beth was going in for surgery at 6:30 (in 20 min, now) so this is my official pray request. Please storm Heaven asking to guide the doctors through a safe and successful surgery and for a full recovery. I'll go ahead and repost the last two posts from CaringBridge here as well so everyone can be up to speed. If you want to keep getting updates you can visit the site here.


some prayers answered and still asking for more
Written Apr 9, 2013 12:09pm by Beth Russell

It's been over 72 hours since Beth was admitted for a hole somewhere in her intestines. The DR's have been monitoring her vital signs very closely and giving her multiple IV meds to keep her nourished, hydrated, antibiotics, blood transfusions, platelets, etc and her vitals have improved each day.
We are so thankful for the outpouring of love and support from family, neighbors and friends. The 'body of 'Christ' has been amazing and we feel it on an hourly/daily basis.
She's not out of the woods yet but things are improving. She has a PET scan set for 2pm today (to get an update on the status of her cancer) then a CT scan in the next couple of days to give a update to the leak in her stomach and what the 'next steps' will be.
Please pray for her pain (it's been better but still seems to spike several times a day) the results of both scans and for guidance from the DR's as to what comes next. We're yet to get any answers as to what's caused the current problem in her stomach and would like to get an answer with a 'game-plan' to fix.

Col: 1:11 - May you be strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all endurance and patience with joy, giving thanks to the Father who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in light.

Terry

Prayers needed! Emergency surgery

Written 11 minutes ago by Beth Russell

Beth's scan this afternoon showed a hole in her colon and she needs emergency surgery. they've taken her back to fix the hole and to put another colostomy in. 
We have no other options at this point and know that God is with her. She went into the O.R. with a smile on her face and a glow that resonated a 'peace' from God.
Please pray for the DR's and the surgery and that God would be with her both physically and emotionally.

Phil 4:13 - I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

Be Grateful for an Extraordinary Life

(from the Courier Journal)

All these pictures are the "little things" in my life 

Have you ever gotten something stuck in your head and you can't get it out? (and for once I don't mean that super catchy 90s n*sync song) I've had one phrase stuck in my head...so much so that I'm writing a blog post at 1am so I can get it out.

Summer concerts

It all started when I was sitting in our new relaxing room the other day, writing a letter. In my letter I was complaining about how things were...situations I wasn't happy about. In retrospect, it's funny because the whole time the newspaper was sitting next to be and I didn't look at it until I was almost finished. When I did look over I noticed that one of the headlines said "Be grateful for an extraordinary life".

JJ "Snow" Angels

Do you ever have those God moments? Where God seems to literally speak to you and tell you exactly what you need to hear? That was it for me. I almost scratched out my whole letter and started over. Why was I sitting there complaining when I should have been writing about all the extraordinary things in my life?

Wine tasting

The other funny thing is that that sentence seemed to be the words I had been searching for since I got back from Italy. When I was there I constantly said I lived in Never Never Land and was never coming home. I read later too, where someone that wrote that they felt like Dorothy after she left Oz. How interesting...have you ever thought about how Dorothy would have felt after seeing everything in Oz then just going back to Kansas?? If she was anything like me then maybe thankful to be home to what is comfortable but at sporadic times "homesick" for that temporary home where everything seemed to be magical.

Sword fights with cardboard tubes

It's been hard last semester and this semester for me to stick it out in school. Somehow I have "senioritius" and I'm not even about to graduate. Work wise, last semester was hard, really hard. I just constantly wanted to go back to Louisville because I had spent so much time away in the summer. And this semester is hard in a different way...my classes are so much easier, but I don't like a single one. Sometimes it's easy to wish away time, especially when you're looking forward to something like I am this summer.

Karaoke in the studio

But as hard as it may be, I have to constantly remind myself (as a very smart friend put it) to enjoy the season I'm in. Which brings me back full circle to my point: be grateful for an extraordinary life. I brought up Italy because it was easy to think of life as extraordinary while I was there. I was doing something completely different than what everyone was doing so obviously my life wasn't ordinary. But here's the thing...my life is still extraordinary every day, even when I'm not abroad. The question is whether I choose to look it at that way or not.

Impromptu bourbon tastings

I am blessed in more ways than I can count. Incredible family and friends, good health, talents, and every advantage in the world. And as I think about what makes every day special, it's the people I'm around that are constantly keeping me on my toes, building me up, and just keeping my life amusing. Did you know you're supposed to spend a minimum of 6 hours around other people every day? Crazy.

Having little visitors in class

There are so many little things that happen every day to be thankful for. And it's all the little things that add up to an extraordinary life. I want my life to be an adventure but it's never going to be one unless I make sure that's what my mindset is. If I take the time to enjoy all the little things every day instead of just waiting for big, exciting things to happen then I realize how truly exceptional life can be.

The 2012 List

If you've talked to me this year, it is very likely that you've heard me mention my 2012 list. It was my New Years Resolution last year to be more adventurous, try more new things, and push myself out of my comfort zone. Why? Because of this:

I decided the best way to do this would be to have a concrete list of things that I've always wanted to do and had never done. The list wound up having 15 things on it and I accomplished all but 4...which will roll over now onto my 2013 list. I'm just going to share a few checks off the list (some may not have been blog appropriate!) but the funny thing was...as I was living my resolution and trying all kinds of new things, I realized I needed to start a new list: things that should have been on my 2012 list. 

So without further ado...

The 2012 List

Things That Should Have Been On The 2012 List

You'll have to wait and see what is on the 2013 list but a lot of the things on the list have to do with physical activities so a lot of the focus of 2013 is on getting back into shape :) (more about that later!) Also I'm going to try really hard to do a blog post a week...we will see if we can get Abigail on board!



xoxo

Take that b****esssssssssss

FULL DISCLOSURE: I wrote this post about a week ago and am just getting it posted (isn't that how life works??) We're getting a little into "Katie Philosophy" but sometimes it helps me figure out what I really am trying to say by talking (or in this case writing) it out. Also there is a little profanity in this post so just keep that in mind...

For anyone who didn't talk to me this week, the beginning was like hell. We had a project due Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. I got 4 hours of sleep Sunday night finishing my Residential project. Then starting Monday morning I was up for 40 hours straight working on my lighting project due Tuesday afternoon. To put it in perspective a little there were 20 about of 26 of us in the computer lab at 4am Tursday morning still working. The amount of work we had is a whole other topic but the point is by the end we were all feeling a little broken.

We have a secret Facebook group for just our class and at the end of Tuesday one of my friends posted this message for all of us:

They tried to break us this week, but we prevailed, this hell of a week is over, we did it. We are part of the best design school in the nation, if you have made it to this point you should know, you are one of the top 27 students in the nation. Take that b****esssssssssss.

I sometimes joke about quitting Interior Design when I get really tired of a project but I know I never, ever would actually do it. I know 1000% that I am in the right major and I am so lucky to be able to do what I love what I love every single day...and to even have found what I love because so many people don't even have that.

Also I love that it's hard. I don't think I've ever had a time in my life where I've picked the easy academic path. Lord knows I love a challenge and this definitely falls in the challenging category.

This brings me back to my friend's post. It reminded me so much of what I had been telling myself over those two days when I got tired: you are awesome and even though this sucks it's going to be over soon and it will be worth it when you get to do exactly what you want to do.

I think right about now, everyone that knows me can laugh because I'm sure you've heard me say "I'm awesome" at one point or another. The sad part, though, is as I write this and you read it, I sound egotistical but in reality, that's not me at all. The more I think about it, the more I realize there is something wrong with a society where it is socially acceptable to tell people how much you are unhappy with yourself...how fat you are, how others have things so much better...but it's not ok to say I'm great? That I am so happy with who I am? Think about that one.

Don't get me wrong. There is definitely a fine line between confidence and cockiness. And as I've thought about it, I think the difference is the humility to admit that you don't know everything. I will say that freely as well. I don't know everything...not even close. But you know what? Thats a GREAT thing. I love learning new things because that's how you become a better person. I think it's so important to be open enough to accept criticism and make it constructive and to know that there are so many things that people can teach you. Learning new things is one of the best parts of life.

I guess this brings me to my point of this post. (ohh wait this post had a point and wasn't just you rambling??) Each of has unique talents and gifts. No one has the same ones and sometimes it's easy to get caught up in what everybody else has. But just remember that other people are thinking the same thing about you. So instead of wishing away our time maybe we should instead be focusing on what we DO have and developing those talents. And you know what? It is PERFECTLY FINE to say you know what? I really like who I am! I'm pretty great! Just remember...there's always something more you can learn :)

P.S. Just for the record...readers, I love you all...and think you're pretty awesome!

P.P.S. All the pictures are of my interior design family :)

The Three Day Rule

Have I mentioned we have the BEST teachers at Auburn?? Not only are they teaching us about the technical interior design things but I think they do a good job pushing us to be our best and helping us with the lessons along the way. 

This post is actually a copy of a post my teacher Virginia, who is in grad school at Auburn, blogged about back in March (you can read her whole blog here!). The timing was great in that she wrote it right after I had just gotten back from formal (the very same one I painted the cooler for). I had put off a bunch of work, it was the end of the semester, and after such a great weekend, I did NOT want to be back in school. VA had me read her 3 Day Rule post and I really think that it's true. 

So this week when I was in her office crying on Monday for absolutely no reason (did I mention she's AWESOME!?! ;) ), she reminded me of the post again. Today is day 4 of being back in Auburn after having a great weekend home and I finally  feel like I'm getting back into the swing of things. I think it's really important to give yourself time to readjust to your "new normal". So without further ado here is Virginia's original post (because she says it best!):

"I have been on 5 trips in 5 weeks. Meaning I have left Auburn 5 times in 5 weeks. Meaning I have had a heck of a lot of fun but have pretty much escaped reality for 35 days, living in a fairy tale, “just get what needs to be done so we can go out of town….” Unfortunately, that’s not how real life works.

Yesterday, I had to climb off of my “fun mountain” and get back to reality. I’m coming off of a 5 week high of fun and vacations and to be honest, I feel like a druggie crashing. Wait, responsibilities… what are those? Back on the budget. Back to running. Back to teaching. Back to work. Being back to those things aren’t near as hard as the emotional, mental and spiritual instability I’m facing. Mom told me yesterday as I walked out of the house in St. Simons, remember the 3 day rule.

So what is the 3 day rule? It’s a rule my mom and I talk about all the time! Here’s the background: when I get off my normal schedule, when I do things out of the ordinary, especially taking vacations or preparing for a major presentation, my body goes into “survival mode”. I have one focus. That focus is to enjoy myself or in the case of a project, to work really hard. The focus is the people or adventures or task in front of me. Stuff like budgets and laundry and eating healthy and exercise and sleep and anything else that gives my life balance, goes to the back burner, or even completely out the window. Then the vacation is over or the presentation is given. And there is an adjustment period. And the adjustment period can get really messy. I actually started making a list in this blog post of some of the emotional meltdowns or freak outs I have had right after these “survival mode” moments but then I reread the list and had to delete it, y’all would think I’m absolutely crazy. (even though most of you think I’m crazy anyway, I felt like I should not give you solid proof by putting it in print….) Let’s just say that the few days after exiting a survival mode period in my life, I should not be making big decisions, or making changes, or evaluating myself or relationships. Why is it such a big deal? Because my head isn’t clear. I’m “off”. I’m crashing after a high. I have to give myself time to readjust to being in the real world.

So my mom calls it the “3 day rule”. Give yourself 3 days to get back to normal. It’s SO important for me to take those 3 days and focus on getting back to normal. I HAVE to run, I HAVE to do laundry, I HAVE to read my Bible, I HAVE to focus on myself. When I don’t… that 3 days turns into 3 weeks, or however long I keep pushing it back. And in that time…. I’m unbalanced. I do things out of character, I make bad decisions, I don’t treat people the way I want to, my priorities are out of whack, I am not responsible. So if you can only imagine what it has been like for me to be out of town 5 times in 5 weeks. There hasn’t really been any opportunity to follow the 3 day rule.

So today, when I texted someone and they didn’t text me back, I got all sad and offended and started questioning our friendship, and then I got mad at myself for acting “crazy”, etc. etc. etc. And I had to check myself, wait VA, it hasn’t been 3 days. Cut yourself some slack. You’re over exaggerating. Take a deep breath. So now I’m in my office, hiding with the light off, headphones in, focusing on my 3 day rule. Focusing on getting myself back balanced. I’m running tonight and doing laundry when I get home. I’m not going to put anything on my plate that doesn’t have to be done. I’m focusing on getting myself back to normal. Following the 3 day rule, just like my momma said to. (and I’m learning that 99.9% of the time, she is always right…..)

xoxo,va"

Stay Awake!

I have a daily devotional book that I read every day and sometimes it surprises me how spot on the reflections can be. I thought I'd share this one because it was exactly what I was thinking the other day.

Therefore, stay awake! For you do not know on which day your Lord will come. 

-Matthew 24:42

"Some think these words apply only to our final moments, when God comes to lead us into the joy of resurrected life.

Well, we certainly want to be prepared for that.

But there are so many other times when God comes to us as he reveals his love throughout our daily lives.

An unexpected call from a cherished friend,

the experience of God's presence in our hearts,

the sound of beautiful music:

All these gifts reveal God's love for us.

We can make our own list, of course, but the point is the same: 

to be awake to the ways in which God comes to us every day.

Life is flush with many gifts, but we'll miss them if we're asleep to what life offers.

And so Jesus tells us to stay awake. If we miss the gifts, we miss the loving presence of the God who gives them."

-Fr. Kenneth E. Grabner, C.S.C.

P.S. All of the pictures are from a trip to the lake with the Morgans this summer for the short bit when Abigail and I were both home!